Answers To The Questions You Don't Want To Ask

1. What do people mean when they say I'll lose all modesty when I have a baby?

Well, they're probably overstating. You'll get the modesty back. However, when you have a baby you need to realize that your va-jay-jay, as it were, is going to be the girl of the hour. It will seem as though EVERYONE is 'down there' at one point or another. Nurses and Doctors will need to do vaginal exams with their gloved fingers to determine how much your cervix is dilating (often called "checking the cervix"). Some women want to be checked often to gage their progress, some women want left alone. However embarrassing, this will need to be done while you are in labor.

When you are fully dilated, often the nurses will place your legs in stirrups, and shine a bright light RIGHT THERE. While you are pushing the staff can monitor how well you are pushing, as well as progress made not only by vaginal checks, but also watching the perineum for crowning (when the pressure baby's head causes the perineum to bulge out, and the labia to separate, revealing the first peek at baby's head!).

Even after delivery, if you are breastfeeding, the staff will need to watch your breastfeeding attempts. This is the only way to help the process if need be, and report to the physician and pediatrician how well baby is nursing. Staff may even need to touch your breast in order to help baby latch on correctly.

So, while there is usually every effort made to maintain your privacy, when you have a baby, there will be a certain amount of exposure going on.

2. Am I going to poo on the delivery table?

Um, maybe. This doesn't happen often, but it does happen. While pushing you are using the same muscles you do when having a bowel movement. It feels like you are having a bowel movement even if you aren't.
However. If a mom does poo, it's always just a small amount, and the caregiver will just quickly wipe it away, and no one really gives it a second thought. Mom usually isn't even aware of it, nor is anyone else.

3. Are my breasts supposed to be leaking while I'm pregnant?

Yes, they are. This is just the body getting ready for baby breastfeeding. It normally begins around 5 months, and generally is only in very small amounts of clear, yellow, or white fluid.

4. Am I going to get aroused while breastfeeding?

Maybe at first. And if you do, it's NORMAL. Breastfeeding should be a pleasurable experience, our bodies are made that way. It doesn't mean anything subconscious is going on, and soon your body will be able to distinguish that pleasurable feeling associated with the closeness and nurturing of your baby from the times of intimacy.

Have more questions? Ask away in the comments, I'll do my best to give you answers to any "embarassing" questions you might have!

What Should You Bring To The Hospital?

While this list can vary greatly from person to person, there are some basic items and ideas which will make your stay more comfortable. Make up your bag a couple of weeks before you're due, even if you are having a planned C-section (babies don't always like to follow our plans!). This way you won't have to worry about the details when the big moment arrives. Be sure your support person knows where this bag is as well!

• Insurance information
• Lotion or oil for massage during labor
• Toothbrush, mouthwash
• Hairbrush
• Other toiletry items for mom(shampoo, deodorant, etc.)
  
• Warm socks
• Relaxing music (check to see if your facility has a CD player, or bring your own)
• Bathrobe
• PJ's
• Bras (consider nursing bras if you are breastfeeding)
• Topical pain relieving spray such as Dermoplast for after vaginal delivery
• Change of clothes for your support person
• Clothing to wear home (something you wore in your 5th or 6th month of pregnancy)
• Camera
• From home snacks or change for the vending machine
• If you are breastfeeding, consider a Boppy style nursing pillow
• Deck of cards, books, movies (check if your facility has VCR or DVD players)
• Overnight maxi pads (hospital may supply these, but your own brand may be more comfortable)
• Several pair of underware you won't mind throwing out (post delivery flow can be quite heavy, you might ask your facility if they provide disposable underware)
• Body Pillow
• Two outfits for baby
• blankets
• Baby Book (ask the nursing staff to put in baby's footprints! Most nurses would be happy to do it . . . don't count on good hand prints though . . . those are tough to get!)
  
• Baby Mittens or socks to prevent baby from scratching face
• Baby nail clippers (hospital staff generally are not allowed to clip baby's nails, and NEVER use adult clippers)
• List of phone numbers of people you will want to call
• Cell phone, you won't be able to call long distance from most hospitals
• Car seat-be sure to try it out in your car first to be sure it fits properly!

Most hospitals will provide diapers, baby wash, baby lotion, etc. If there is a specific brand you would like to use however, be sure to bring your own.

True Labor VS Braxton Hicks

The beginning of labor is different for every woman, and every pregnancy!

How can you tell the difference between your body's "practice contractions" known as Braxton Hicks, and The Big Show? Braxton Hicks contractions can sometimes be very difficult to differentiate from real labor, and sometimes can only be determined by a vaginal exam. The main difference is Braxton Hicks contractions will not dilate your cervix or help baby drop lower into the pelvis in preparation for birth as true labor will. Remember, if there is any doubt, call your caregiver or hospital.

Some basic differences between the two:

• Braxton Hicks contractions may subside after you drink a couple glasses of water, empty your bladder, and lie on your left side for an hour or two. True labor will persist after these interventions.
  
• Usually Braxton Hicks will remain irregular and short, true labor contractions may begin as irregular contractions, but will become more regular, longer, closer together, and stronger with time.
• In true labor, contractions may become stronger while walking, and do not cease while resting. Braxton Hicks contractions will not be affected by walking, and resting might make them stop.
• You may feel nauseated, have diarrhea, or vomit with true labor. With Braxton Hicks you will not.
• There may be bloody show in true labor as your cervix dilates, this won't be present with Braxton Hicks unless you have had a recent vaginal exam.
• Braxton Hicks contractions are often felt in the top of the uterus or in the groin area. True labor often starts in the lower back and radiates to the front.

How To Time Your Contractions:

First write down the time at the beginning of one contraction and again at the beginning of the next. The time between actually includes the contraction itself, and the time in between contractions. So if your contraction lasts 60 seconds, and there are four minutes until the next one, your contractions are 5 minutes apart.

A good rule of thumb:

• First time mom's should come to the hospital or call their caregiver (if a home birth) when contractions reach three to five minutes apart for a full hour.
• For veteran moms, come to the hospital when your contractions have been five to seven minutes apart for a full hour.

Most mothers are more comfortable spending the beginning part of labor at home, rather than in the hospital. However, if at any time you feel you need to be checked out by the hospital or your caregiver do so! Don't be embarrassed or upset if you are told you're having 'false labor', or are in the very early stages of labor. That baby will arrive eventually, I promise!